It is an unfortunate fact that passion can start to fade after as little as two years of living together. This decrease in desire is more pronounced for women, and there is no magic switch that will help you getting in the mood for sex. Fortunately, science has developed some solutions where magic has failed.
Give Your Body a Chance
Despite actively wanting to have sex, some women will avoid having sex because they simply don’t feel like actually engaging in sexual activities. Sometimes the body just needs the opportunity to get out of that rut, and the best course of action is to just get started. If you’re not in the mood, engaging in heavy foreplay and other sexual contact can actually be the key to kick starting your desire.
Don’t Shy Away from Naughty Thoughts
Far too many women are ashamed to admit that they think about sex, but thinking about sex can actually help you get in the mood. Entertaining erotic fantasies throughout the day can mentally prepare you for executing one of those little daydreams or simply jumping your partner. If you have a few unoccupied moments in your day, fill the time with some quality fantasizing.
Share Fantasies with Your Partner
After entertaining erotic thoughts throughout the day, you should feel free to share some of those thoughts with your partner. You won’t always get a chance to act on those fantasies, but giving voice to your erotic daydreams can help you get in the mood. If you’re really lucky, you and your partner can work on fulfilling some of those fantasies.
Broaden Your Sexual Repertoire
Unfortunately for men and women around the world, sex can get boring, and you are less inclined to feel sexual desire when you’re bored. Adding some variety to your sex life does not mean that you need to transform your bedroom into a kinky sex dungeon, but mixing things up can help. Even small changes can be the spark that you need. You might consider using different lingerie, new positions, or other alterations to your bedroom activity. You might even consider taking those activities out of the bedroom once in awhile. You can always consult your partner about personal kinks and fantasies, and you’ll both reap the benefits of these experiments.
Engage in Other Forms of Physical Closeness
Some established couples treat sex like a business transaction that occurs after a long day at separate workplaces, so sharing a bed is the only source of intimacy. Engaging in some completely nonsexual forms of touching can actually set the mood better than an erotic massage. Prolonged physical closeness gives you the opportunity to see, feel, and smell your partner. A cuddle on the couch after a meal or simply holding hands can get you in the mood for sex.
Thinking about masturbating when you’re not in the mood to have sex with your partner might seem outrageous, but the practice is not without merit. Masturbating on a regular basis can actually increase the level of your desire. Additionally, masturbating with your partner present can be a huge turn on for both of you.
Why would you be in the mood for sex if you don’t feel sexy? Find the things that make you feel sensual, and make those things a regular part of your life. Is there a set of lingerie that does the trick? Do you have a dress that fits in all of the right ways? If it makes you feel sexy, find a way to squeeze that object of sensuality into your life. If you feel confident and sexy throughout the day, you’re more likely to be in the mood when you and your partner want to have sex.
The gym is a surprisingly exciting place. Engaging in exercise can improve your energy levels and result in the release of endorphins. Both of these positive changes can lead to increased desire. A gym membership might be just what you need to get your blood pumping.
Drop the Smartphone
Distractions can kill the mood before you get started, and many modern distractions come in the form of smartphones. You and your partner should not be focusing on text messages, social media, or email when you’re trying to feel frisky. You should minimize distractions and avoid taking gadgets to bed with you.
Getting in the Mood for Sex
There is nothing wrong with not being in the mood for sex sometimes, but a complete lack of desire can be detrimental to your self-confidence and your relationship. Some of the tips listed above might seem a bit daunting at first, but each tip could hold the key to helping you get in the mood for sex.